From weird to downright creepy to kind of cute, these truly odd dog accessories on Etsy have one thing in common: they’re so entertaining. Dog poop soap, anyone? Here are 12 of the weirdest dog items we’ve ever seen!
1. Custom Dog Pillow
You can get a pillow in the photographic likeness of your dog. But why would you? To create an elaborate ruse? To hug your dog without feeling bad about it after reading that study? Because you live in a haunted house?
2. Walter Keane “No Dogs Allowed” Print
OK, let’s just lean into the creepiness a little bit while we’re here. Walter Keane is a certain aesthetic. That is understood. These two sets of eyes boring into your soul is not fully understood.
3. Save the Date Dog Signs
These are cute, I guess. They just look a little heavy, and the “I loved her first” statement casts a certain indignation on the dog wearing it. But they do meet a very specific need.
4. Marine Dog Uniform
An officer and a gentleman AND a bulldog.
5. Dog Spoon Rest
This spoon rest has seen some things. If not yet, it will.
6. Crocheted Pet Carrier
Just hangin’ out! To be fair, the dog model looks like he’s enjoying the process a lot more in other product shots. But in this one, he looks like a kid who’s too big for his stroller.
7. “Home is Where Your Dog Lives” Sign
Yes. The nicest remark your guests can make about this sign when they come over is, “so true.” This shop also makes a sign that says, “PMS: Purchase More Shoes” so…lots of tough calls to make when you’re filling up your shopping cart.
8. Dog Poo Handmade Soap
Oh, mercy. You can select French Lavender, Peppermint, or Vanilla scent, but I doubt anyone will use this soap to find out what it smells like. You can also buy them in packs of two, five, or 15, so dream big!
9. Dog Vader Shirt
This shirt was featured in a Kylie Jenner Father’s Day gift guide so clearly she’s in on a joke that I’m just not picking up. To break it down, it’s a shirt for a human, quoting Darth Vader, but changing the word “Luke” to “dog.” And there’s a dog, ostensibly the one saying “Dog, I am Your Father,” because he’s wearing a Darth Vader helmet. Is the joke that you have to pay to subscribe to thekyliejenner.com?
10. Dachshund Jedi Magnet
Now this is how you do dog Star Wars humor. It tells a story, it’s cute—it makes sense?
11. Meditating Dog Statue
Some people have Buddha statues in their garden, other people prefer to add some personal flair while keeping the peace.
12. Dog Birdhouse
Aahhhhhh! It’s hanging. And it’s a home for birds. And it has a booty hole.
So go forth, down into the rabbit hole of Etsy, and find whatever speaks to your heart. Whether you love dogs and birds, or dogs and Star Wars, or dogs and carrying them around, Etsy has the right item for you. You might even find something beyond your imagination, the thing you never knew you needed.