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These Excellent Dog Bios Are So On-Point You Can’t Help but Laugh

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These Excellent Dog Bios Are So On-Point You Can’t Help but Laugh

For Dog People
By Kiki Kane

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Dog lovers are going wild for a new meme that pairs cute dogs with imaginary back stories that are both ridiculous and ridiculously accurate. It all adds up to a caricature that may sound just a little like someone you know.

BarkPost has been perfecting the art of the dog bio on their Instagram page for the last year or so, making them the bio pros. We’ve collected some of our favorites here.

Gloria

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She routinely drunk texts her grandchildren. via @chloekardoggian

A post shared by BarkBox (@barkbox) on Jul 27, 2017 at 12:15pm PDT

Jerry

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You've been on a flight with Jerry. #dogbios #barkbios Luggage available at @barkshop Jerry @punnypooches

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Aug 17, 2017 at 2:41pm PDT

Pearl

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She may or may not have invented flower crowns. Via @kingkong_vely

A post shared by BarkBox (@barkbox) on Jun 29, 2017 at 1:22pm PDT

Clarence

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We found another picture of your dad. #dogdadbios #barkbios @hoohoo_thebully

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Jun 17, 2017 at 5:33pm PDT

Miriam

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My morning routine is not about you, Nana. via @nelsonthegoldendoodle

A post shared by BarkBox (@barkbox) on Jun 16, 2017 at 9:51am PDT

Craig

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Describe your dad ? #dogdadbios #barkbios #fathersday @hudsonthegoldendoodle

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Jun 16, 2017 at 6:08pm PDT

Barb

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She would never own an appliance that wasn't stainless steel. via @goldenluca07

A post shared by BarkBox (@barkbox) on Jun 12, 2017 at 5:05pm PDT

Logan

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When you're too sexy for American Apparel shirts… Happy Birthday to @bobbyflaythedog ?? #dogbios #barkbios

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Nov 3, 2016 at 12:17pm PDT

Dani

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Yikes. #dogsofcoachella #literallythatsyou @chiathechihuahua

A post shared by BarkBox (@barkbox) on Apr 15, 2017 at 12:11pm PDT

Jerry

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He just likes to listen. #dogbios #barkbios Jerry @sacco_sorry

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Aug 22, 2016 at 6:32pm PDT

Bijou

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Why yes we did make a rose toy for your dog if that's what you're wondering. @bijouthesnortypig Link in bio ?#bijousblessedlife

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Aug 5, 2017 at 12:59pm PDT

Mr. Stetson

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"I'll wait"-Literally every teacher ever #barktoschool #dogbios #barkbios Mr. Stetson @rustyrodas

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Sep 9, 2016 at 9:56am PDT

Diane

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Loves dishing juicy goss over a glass of Sauvignon Blanc. #dogbios #barkbios @ittystagram

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Aug 3, 2017 at 1:01pm PDT

Trevor

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Take it easy on the Yoo-hoo Trev. #barktoschool #barkbios #dogbios Trevor @rambothepuppy

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Sep 8, 2016 at 3:31pm PDT

Abigail

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What a glamorous equestrian. #kentuckyderby #barkbios @lisamcpartland6

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 6, 2017 at 4:17pm PDT

Bree

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Feeling nourished & ready to rage in the desert. #chroniclesofbree #DogsOfCoachella #barkbios #teambree @yutafamily

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Apr 14, 2017 at 5:43pm PDT

Margot

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"Hbd? Really?" #literallythatsmargot #barkbios Happy Actual Birthday to our girl @dolly_pawton #staysassy ❤️?

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Feb 16, 2017 at 6:33pm PST

Amy

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Dog mom bios are back for #mothersday weekend & they want you to wear a light jacket. @manly_marlowe #dogbios #barkbios #literallythatsyourmom

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 12, 2017 at 6:55pm PDT

Gloria

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Smells like Chanel No. 5 at all times. #dogbios #barkbios @chloekardoggian

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Jul 12, 2017 at 9:30am PDT

Kathy

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We all know a Kathy. #mothersday #dogmombios #barkbios @happy_golden

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 14, 2017 at 4:01pm PDT

Laurie

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Every mother is unique. Happy #mothersday #dogmombios #barkbios @teddyrowe6868

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 14, 2017 at 8:49am PDT

Joan

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This dog bio is definitely not inspired by the real mothers of the @bark employees. #dogmombios #mothersday #barkbios @blizzardbernedoodle

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 13, 2017 at 2:53pm PDT

Debbie

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There's a Debbie in every family. Tell us about your fam & we will turn them into a dog bio ? #HolidayDogBios #HomeIsWhereTheDogIs #BarkBios Debbie @ranger_doodle

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Nov 23, 2016 at 8:05am PST

Maggie

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Maggie could probably use a decaf…#barktoschool #barkbios #dogbios Maggie @taco_minnie

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Sep 13, 2016 at 2:13pm PDT

Sheila

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Someone get Sheila an apple juice on the rocks STAT. #DogWeddingBios Sheila @pennyloupup Photo by @thedogstyler #weddings #BarkBios #dogbios #BarkBios #barkpost #dogweddings

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on Jul 9, 2016 at 11:08am PDT

Chloe

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Special Birthday #BarkBio for the one and only @chloekardoggian ❤️? #dogbios #barkbios #barkpack #barkbox

A post shared by Bark (@bark) on May 11, 2016 at 9:15am PDT

Day made.

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Kiki Kane

Kiki Kane is a canine chef, professional blogger, and lifelong animal lover owned by a Frenchie-Boston mix named Bea Pickles and a geriatric kitty named Mogwai. As a dog chef and member of Rover's Dog People Panel, she creates original dog-friendly recipes for the web series Kiki's Canine Kitchen.

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