From “My dog is my copilot” to “Who rescued who?”, there are any number of snappy dog catchphrases you might be familiar with. But that’s not what this bit is about. Au contraire, dog lovers—here are ten lines you will never EVER hear escape a pet parent’s mouth.
This fur totally goes with my chambray.
Where’s the iPod so I can turn on some Whitney Houston while you busy yourself humping the mail man’s leg?
I can’t wait to wrap my digits around this steaming hot poop in the front yard.
My dog is my actual co-pilot.