Dogs get a free pass when it comes to a lot of things. From nether-region sniffing to the occasional bladder miscalculation, our pals get away with stuff no one else would (or should). Let’s visit all the ways our four legged fiends commit small time crime and come out smelling like roses…unless they stepped in something foul.
Yawning anytime time they feel like it
Apparently, these guys didn’t find the new episode of SNL or your day at work all that interesting. Oh well, nothing beats the cute way their snouts crinkle when they do.
Chewing up the most inconvenient items imaginable—
—like the toilet paper holder or the lint roller. How do they even manage to track down this stuff?
Pooping in the middle of the floor
Sometimes it’s right outside the friendly neighborhood cafe for all the patrons to see through the window and sometimes in the middle a high intensity agility contest…we get it. There are times that nature’s call simply can’t be ignored.
Sassing their parents with zero repercussions
Even our better halves have off days every now and then. This is why they get a get-out-of-jail-free card for their occasional talk-to-the-paw levels of sass.
Shamelessly stealing food
Whether it’s taking a lap of your tomato soup when you turn your back or gunning for the cat’s food come dinner time, we get it: dogs love to steal food. We’d probably do the same thing if we were in their paws.
Waking us up by licking our faces
Giving you a slobbery 6:30am wakeup call when you had every intention of sleeping in.
Hiding things under their hefty sleeping bodies
Obscuring the remote/phone/car keys by falling asleep on it, perpetuating a wild goose chase which ends only when your pooch rolls over and you realize they were on top of it the whole time.
Getting fur on that expensive wool jacket. They just want to leave you with something to remember them by while you’re at work.
Waking up the neighborhood
Waking up half the neighborhood by barking bloody murder at innocuous house sounds like the ice machine at 2am.
Curiosity might have killed the cat, but with dogs, curiosity just sees them with their heads stuck between the fence trying to sneak a peek at the backyard bbq on the other side.
Hogging the couch
Being too lazy to go for a walk around the block. One thing you can always count on when it comes to dogs is unwavering honesty.