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Owner asks: How do I handle neighbor reporting abuse by the dogsitter?

I'll make this as brief as possible and seeking responses immediately as I have a scheduled meeting tonight with said dogsitter.

I would love opinions on whether or not I should confront my dogsitter and if so, how to do it.

Situation: I just returned from a 10 day trip and left my 2 dogs (4 months and 7 years) in the care of a dogsitter recommended by his mom who is an acquaintance of mine. I chose this particular 35 yr old man because he had suffered a stroke and his mom told me he loves animals and due to his recovery, he could not work and was home all the time napping and hanging out. Since I had a puppy, this appealed to me because of the supervision she requires and potty training needs. I met with him twice before my trip and had no issues.

Upon my return, my neighbor came over to report that she felt the puppy was neglected and abused in my absence. They witnessed 4-5 accounts of high-pitched yelping coming from the house immediately following verbal reprimands (one they could clearly hear was related to a potty accident). The neighbor spent 4 days building a deck in her yard and said that my puppy was in my yard unsupervised for up to 3 hours at a time (laying next to the fence trying to get her attention). The worst report was that she had dug a hole and dogsitter "laid into her" so badly, she was "yelping bloody murder".

Beside myself with guilt and anger, I called the mother yesterday to discuss. She said that she was shocked to hear this and did not believe it was possible. She and her husband had ALSO helped dogsit when the son had to go to doctor visits. She did, however, corroborate the story about the puppy digging the hole and told me her son reported to her "I really laid into her because I wanted to make sure she wouldn't dig again. She wouldn't come near me for 2 hours afterward". She said there was another incident where the puppy was trying to escape the yard and he essentially smashed her with the door trying to prevent her escape and she yelped for quite a while afterward).

The mom asked me to delay the meeting with her son so she could be in town to support him following my meeting tonight because the stroke has made him extremely vulnerable to panic attacks and she's worried I'm going to traumatize him. I also inquired about his anger aggression which ( I just learned yesterday) is present in up to 30% of stroke victims and she confirmed to me he DID have issues with that in months past but she thought his meds had cured that.

My puppy seems fine except for new fear/ submission peeing. Mother reported this happened in her presence as well. This could be from fear over the incidents ... (more)

Comments

Hi there, what an awful situation! As a Rover sitter, I most definitely think this man needs to be reported to Rover. If he was a certified Rover sitter, his anger issues and negligence when it came to your poor pop are not okay, and this probably happens to other dogs too.

5 Answers

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What a sad and ugly situation :( I am so sorry to hear your doggies had to go through this, but it seems this is not a Rover sitter, this was just a person you used because his mom recommended him. Bad choice. Choosing a sitter because you feel sorry for a 35 year old man with serious health issues, is a bad decision. If you own a puppy, do invest in a professional sitter recommended by dog owners and not by his mom. I do understand you wanted to help him, but this was a wrong choice for your doggies. I personally would never hire a man to watch my puppies because his mom says he's awesome and because I feel bad for him. Give him money or a giftcard but do not hire him :(

You should pay him as promised and move on without causing a scene, and without even bringing up his negligence. He may not take it well and you don't want to cause him any more health problems. You would also risk losing a friend in his mom who would not appreciate you criticizing her son. It's not worth it.

I do not want to sound mean, but you made a bad choice and instead of choosing a professional person you chose a sick male. I understand very much your compassion. Life is suffering. I absolutely understand. Good luck sweetie, you are a wonderful person I can tell from your need trying to help others, but just pay him, wish him well and forgive him. It's not his fault he is the way he is.

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Pay him and be done with it. There is only one critical thing to convey to him and his mother and that is scaring or punishing dogs is NOT the way to train them, He has caused perhaps irreversible harm to the puppy's psyche.

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Hi Leanne! I'm so sorry to hear you are in this predicament. That's a tough call.

On one hand you did know ahead of time that this man had suffered from a stroke and although he may have been home full time, may not have been the best choice to sit your puppy that requires a lot of care and attention.

On the other hand, you did not know that he would verbally abuse your pup or use methods of negative reinforcement that you do not agree with. If I were in your position, I would confront this man and tell him that I will not be hiring him in the future to dogsit, and am displeased with the methods used. It's hard to prove anything because it's all he said she said, but I would try to negotiate the pay to a lesser amount.

If it's possible to have your neighbor in on the meeting, maybe that might be beneficial, as well. :) Was this booked through Rover? If so - Rover support helpline offers lots of insight into tricky situations and they might have something helpful to say, as well.

I hope everything works out and am so sorry your puppy was not treated like they deserved to be.

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Unless it would be dangerous to confront this sitter, I would take the neighbor or another trusted person with me and talk to him and his mother asking for details/explanation. After all, he did admit to "letting into" your puppy for digging. I wouldn't use this sitter again unless I found that the neighbor was exaggerating or misunderstood. Hearing yelling and yelping would definitely concern me.

If this is a Rover sitter, please report it to them.

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You should immediately contact Rover support @ [Edit: Rover’s contact options have changed. Visit the Rover Help Center at https://support.rover.com/ to find the phone number, help articles, or chat with the team] if you suspect your dogs weren't provided proper care